The Ethics of Influence

Before you try to move someone, ask whether your influence will make their life—and the world—better.

We influence people every day.

We recommend.

We persuade.

We teach.

We lead.

We sell.

We encourage people to make decisions.

But influence comes with a responsibility:

Are we actually making things better?

There are two powerful questions for anyone trying to influence another person:

1. If they say yes, will their life improve?

2. When the interaction ends, will the world be better than when it began?

These questions create a simple ethical test for influence.

The first question forces you to think beyond the transaction.

Don't ask:

“Can I convince them?”

Ask:

“Will this actually improve their situation?”

If the answer is no, getting the “yes” isn't a success.

It's simply persuasion without value.

The second question takes the idea even further.

Your interaction doesn't exist in isolation.

Every decision affects other people.

Your customers.

Your team.

Your partners.

Your community.

So ask:

“Did I leave something better than I found it?”

This changes the way you approach influence.

You stop thinking only about getting someone to say yes.

You start thinking about creating a mutually beneficial outcome.

Their success matters.

Your success matters.

And the impact of the interaction matters.

Imagine applying these questions to everything you do.

Before making a recommendation:

Will this help them?

Before leading someone:

Will this make them better?

Before selling something:

Will this improve their life?

Before asking someone to take action:

Will the outcome be worth it for them?

This doesn't mean every decision has to benefit everyone equally.

It means you should be able to stand behind the value you're creating.

If someone says yes, you should genuinely believe they're better off because they did.

That's a very different mindset from simply trying to win.

And here's the deeper lesson:

Influence isn't inherently good or bad.

It depends on what you're using it for.

The ability to move people is powerful.

Use that power to create value.

Help people make better decisions.

Create opportunities.

Solve problems.

Improve lives.

The best influence doesn't leave someone thinking:

“I was convinced.”

It leaves them thinking:

“I'm glad I did that.”

That's the difference between manipulation and meaningful influence.

So before you try to move someone, pause.

Ask yourself:

Will their life improve if they say yes?

Will the world be better because of this interaction?

If the answer to both is yes—

you're probably moving people in the right direction.

Don't measure your influence only by how many people say yes.

Measure it by what happens after they do.

Because the ultimate goal isn't simply to move people.

It's to move them somewhere better.

Thanks for reading ;)

Nino